Sunday Again!

Sun-day.  It was actually even sunny for a while to fit the name.  You might note by my talk about the weather that I don't have much to say for my ROW80 check-in.

I guess that's not actually true.  I'm doing lots of reading and journaling for my coaching course, and I am loving it so much!  And while doing all of that, I realized that I've somehow built up this big, angsty wall around my writing.  On some levels I think I just let it get too important to me.  It got too weighty.  I became too afraid that I wasn't any good at it, and the more I thought that the less I managed to write.

For now I'm just focusing on regularly putting words on paper.  I'll worry about stories later, when writing and I get to know each other again and become good and happy friends again.  I'm not even going to do three pages a day.  One page, one side.  That's enough.  And it probably won't be every day, just more days than not.  For now, I'm just going to court the words and get back in the swing of things.

That's it for now.  I'll check in on some blogs tomorrow--it's just a little too late tonight.  Thanks for all the nice comments on my post about not doing a check-in on Wednesday.  See you all on leap day!

Writing Journal February 13-19, 2012

I'm not going to do the day-by-day breakdown for this week.  I started a creativity coaching certification class, so the writing I did all week was in fits and spurts, journaling and note taking for class.  This may be a theme, at least for a few weeks.

Blown Away

I'm feeling like a dandelion, half blown apart and drifting on the wind.  It's already Sunday and time for the next ROW80 check-in?  And it's the half-way point.  Just past it, actually.

I think I have to acknowledge that I'm not getting anything done this round.  I'm spinning my wheels.  That happens to me a lot.  This time, I'm not going to give up and go into hiding over it, though.  I am going to make some adjustments.  If I have to adjust things every week until I find something that works, so be it.

I've started certification training as a Kaizen Muse Creativity Coach this week.  One of the things we'll be doing during training is working on a creative project of our own.  I am choosing to recommit to my story and find my way back into it.

My plans on how to do this may change as I go along.  For now, I'm going to use the novel engage tactic I learned from StoryWonk.  Each weekday, I will do something that helps me connect with and stay engaged with my story for at least 10 minutes.  Some of the things I plan to do:

• Write part of the story
• Work on the outline
• Make playlists to write by or for characters or scenes
• Find outfits for my characters to wear for particular scenes
• Journal as a character
• Work on a writing prompt to make it relate to my story

Thanks for all the words of encouragement, fellow ROW-ers!  You guys are what is keeping me from just putting the whole thing aside again until months from now I can't stay away any longer.  Thank you for helping me keep going!

I'm Late! I'm Late!

I'm not actually late for anything.  I just feel like I am.  My Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching class (KMCC from now on) starts tonight (and I am so excited I can hardly stay in my seat!), and I have a few things I really have to do before then, so I'm feeling pressured.  And life has been busy the past few days.  And it's already time for a ROW80 check-in, and I haven't done any writing.  And... Yep, my brain is swirling out of control.

I did manage to visit some blogs since Sunday, so that's good.  I haven't picked up the story to start that read-through.  Why?  Don't know.  Working on that part, though.

Right now I have to call the restaurant we went to Monday night.  They charged our debit card for the whole table of eleven people.  They were supposed to be fixing it today, and I know it's only 2 p.m., but I'm impatient.  Especially because I have to leave in an hour to pick up a few groceries and then get home to get on my class call.  I would really like my money back today! 

That was my really long winded way of saying I'm cutting this short.  There's a joke in there somewhere...

Writing Journal February 6-12, 2012

Monday, February 6, 2012
Today's writing was letters for the Time Travelers' Ball and Exposition.  It's odd how hard it can be to get just the right tone while still getting across all the information you need to pass along and while keeping things nice and short.  The letters (well, the other two turned into a postcard and a flyer) took much longer than I thought they would.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

A read through of the letters and marketing materials for the Ball with the changed M. suggested.  Then some notes for the new story idea.  And a very brief, one paragraph bit of journaling.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Today I realized that I really need to read over what I've written so far on my novel.  I've let myself get too far away from the story.  I'm not living in the story world any more, so I don't know what my people are doing or what might happen to them next.  So for the next week-ish, I'm going to be reading my story and making outline notes to get me back into it.

I also finally fit in a nice chunk of journaling time today.  I came to a realization about that.  Journaling *is* my meditation practice.  But it's not that eventually I will get to a point where I'm a journaler and when I'm good at it or do it enough or (insert random "someday when" clause here), then I'll be a spiritual journaler or master journaler or some such thing.  I journal and I use it as a meditation.  Now.  Just the way I do it.  I may not do it as often as I mean to or as often as I should to really get the benefits.  But, just like with people who do other forms of meditation, I do what I can with where I am now, and I move forward as I can.  I don't have to be perfect right now and do it every day or even for a certain amount of time each day to get something out of it.  It's my meditation right now, not someday when I get to some unknown target spot.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

I printed out Chapter 1 of Ordinary Girl, and I meant to start the read-through today, but I just sat it on the edge of my desk and didn't touch it.  It was an off day.  My mother was rushed to the hospital (doing okay now but will be in ICU for a few days while they give her units of blood and try to find where she's bleeding from this time around--so frustrating, because the bleeding is from a medicine reaction which continues causing problems even though she's been off the medicine for six months or more, but I'm wandering now).  I was working on my own in the office, so my workday schedule was off kilter.  Then I got a cold sore and sore throat that came on very fast partway through the day.  I feel as if these things shouldn't throw me off as much as they do, but maybe I just need to acknowledge that things like this DO throw me off, and then I can figure out a plan for what to do when (not if) I am thrown for a loop.  I did a lot of journaling after work (after having to drive all the way back because I got home only to find that I couldn't get into my house because my house keys were still at work), so writing did happen at least.  A few notes, mostly questions to answer, went into the STAR (new story) file, too.  So it was a weird day, but I wasn't stagnant.  I think that might be a victory of sorts.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Today was about e-mails.  A little bit of journaling, but not much at all.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Journaling today, and I wonder why I don't manage to make time for it more often when I really like the feeling I get of my thoughts getting sorted and cleared?  Also some reading and note taking/thinking on paper for my upcoming coaching class.  I'm getting very excited for that--can't wait until Wednesday!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Blog post today.  That was all I managed to make room for in my writing life.  Better than nothing, I suppose.

C Plus

When I was little, my uncle (my mother's brother) would visit frequently on the weekends.  My mother and my aunt would always make enough food for eighty people, and then they'd make more the next day.  Everyone would eat and eat, and at the end of the meal when everyone was sitting back in their chairs, sated, my uncle would proclaim, "C plus."  I asked him once why, when the food was always so good, he gave that grade.  He said, "That way, they will do their best next time, too, trying to top this.  If you give an 'A' there's nothing else to work for."

This week for my ROW80 goals, I really did earn a C+.  But it does leave me more to strive for in the coming week, right?

Last week:

• I wrote four days, not five, but I'm happy that I did what I did.
• I didn't exercise.  I think this week I need to rethink my plan there, because it's not working.
• I did visit more blogs this week.
• I didn't do any cleaning/organizing aside from the normal kitchen stuff
• I did work more on my internet use schedule, and that went really well.  It seems to work better if I fiddle around on the internet during my lunch hour rather than directly after.  I seem to be able to shut it down and move on more easily for some reason, so I'm going to stick to that schedule this week to see if it's still working that way.

It's a little weird that this week finally felt like I was getting back on track.  I had a special project to work on at the office that took away some of my usual blogging/writing time.  I had a day where I was in the office alone and had to do both jobs instead of just my own.  My mother went back into the hospital because she has internal bleeding again.  I had a meeting after work Wednesday for an event I'm helping organize so had almost no time that day for anything of my own.  Sometimes it seems like I get more done when my schedule is busier.  Any of you ever notice that happening?  Anyhow...

For the coming week:

• Write at least 15 minutes 5 days; make at least 3 of these fiction practice
• Finish reading what I've written so far on Ordinary Girl
• Figure out what I need to do to start exercising again
• Clean/organize at least one area in the house
• Visit at least 8 ROW-er blogs

Dull and Boring on the Outside

Everybody has a secret world inside of them. All of the people of the world, I mean everybody. No matter how dull and boring they are on the outside, inside them they've all got unimaginable, magnificent, wonderful, stupid, amazing worlds. Not just one world. Hundreds of them. Thousands maybe. ~Neil Gaiman

Sometimes the Wednesday ROW80 check-in comes a little too fast...

So far this week I've done a bit of journaling.  Lots and lots of reading--I cannot put down these Shadow Unit stories! Most of my writing has been letters for an event I'm working on, but I've also been working on notes for my new story. 

Shan Jeniah Burton asked the other day if I could work on two stories at once.  (Thank you for asking that!) I did a little writing and a lot of contemplating about that and then realized that I don't actually have to make that decision.  The new idea isn't ready for writing yet.  I have a couple of characters and lots of ideas for types of characters I need to add in.  I have some place ideas and ideas for monsters/bad guys.  I also have a growing list of things I need to research.  So this story (stories!) idea isn't ready for writing at all just now.  It's just ready for lots of fun researching and brainstorming and planning.

As for Ordinary Girl,  I was trying to get back into the writing but had to admit that I've let myself get away from it for too long.  I'm completely out of the story right now, so I'm starting a read through of what I have so far (no editing or revising, just reading) so I can get back into the story.  And then I'm just going to write.  I have a feeling the part I'm in right now is going to take a lot of random writing that will have to be cut later to get me to the next scene, but I think that's okay.  I think if that's what's going to get me moving and on to the next part, then so be it.  I'll do what I can now and fix it later.  This freezing up when I don't have an idea for what's supposed to happen isn't helping anything.  At least if I'm writing something I have a chance of figuring out what's really going on in this scene so I can wrap it up. 

I didn't manage to get to anyone's blogs since Sunday. I'm so sorry, everyone!  I feel like a complete slacker.  But really, these stories are keeping me up way too late every night.  I'm stealing bits of time during the day to read a page or two.  It's been ages since I've had this much fun with stories I'm reading, so while I do feel bad for shirking my supporter duties, it's really been pretty awesome.  And they're really feeding my inner storyteller, so that's an added bonus.