Thursday, March 23, 2006


I was going to escape a few minutes early, but I had a sudden epiphany. (Are there slow epiphanies?)

A long-time, partially formed thought I keep pushing under the surface of my consciousness finally emerged and became verbalized.

I am resistant to defining my dreams because I am afraid of what will happen next. I procrastinate doing any of the things that might actually lead to living my dreams because I am afraid. There is a definite fear of failure, yes. But there is another fear that I just finally put a name to. I am afraid that I won't actually be able to do the things that need doing in order to try to live my dreams. I'm afraid I won't be able to figure out what needs to be done and when. I'm afraid I won't be able to figure out how to actually DO any of it, do the things that will lead to living my dreams.


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